Wednesday, February 15
Tuesday, February 14
breaking the rule of thirds
here is a good example.
Einstein's Theory 'Improved'
A Chinese astronomer from the University of St Andrews has fine-tuned Einstein's groundbreaking theory of gravity, creating a 'simple' theory which could solve a dark mystery that has baffled astrophysicists for three-quarters of a century.
(taken from here)
random update
so ... Sunday evening we (7 victims I think) went to a japanese restaurant in limassol, to sample the japanese cuisine.
I'm sory I didn't get my camera with me.
I had sashimi (good, if you can ea raw fish/octopus with sauce), water (I had drank some before so I knew what to expect ;)), sake (a combination between a strong alcoholic dring and hot wine, but not very strong; all in all drinkable), shake (that is not milk-shake; the name is read as sha-ke, and is a fried salmon with vegetables recipe and all-in-all a great dish) with garlic rice and mixed seafood soup (exotic, different, but a great taste).
The soup actualy contained algae/seaweed.
Yesterday ... well ... it was nothing spectacular, except being an usual monday morning :|, and today ... today is not finished yet, so I wouldn't know :).
Sunday, February 12
on meaning
Now, it's dawn; the kind of dawn that smells of fresh air; all in all a good sign for new beginnings.
It's half past six on a sunday morning and I just got home. I went to A&A's farewell party last night.
And a good party it was; we had some drinks, talked a lot and generally had fun; we shared a few laughs; and I talked some with M and A and all the other guys, and I got that meaning back; When we got out the door A said he wished he'd filmed this as he'd like to remember it. The fact that he said it, finally drove the point accross to me: they're leaving.
I wanted to say though that remembering it is all we need, and there's no need to record it to keep it precious.
a night awake is a gained extra daythis is what was written in Dune anyway.
Thanks for sharing a night awake with me
utnapistim
Monday, February 6
Thursday, February 2
my new cube
"It's not much, but it's home..."
"I think it's brilliant"
(from one of the Harry Potter movies)
Pure Silence
A gentle, loving, inner peace and silence is here and now in this moment. It has always been this way. It is always here. It is right here within you and all around you, a stillness, an apparent void, a seeming nothingness out of which everything arises, exists, and eventually returns.
You know this. You have felt this.
There is nothing more than this.
You are this.
(taken from Pure Silence)
Tuesday, January 31
my blog is dead! long live my weblog!!!
today i got my finger free (no more embalming) and went on the skates again (infact I just arrived home).
Damn, I missed it! The physical exercise ... after it you remain with a sense of ... fulfillment ... but contrary to these words, I didn't find this feeling when I was going to the gym ...
Call it a dose of endorphines if you will ... I will keep on calling it fulfillment.
Anyway, I hopefully will keep to writing in here when something changes (like me being in a new project - I didn't feel like posting about it - probably wasn't out of my 'dark vision' period yet).
Also, Saturday I've been invited to a small B-day party, planned another outing with the skates with A, and (weather permitting) a diving trip with P & K.
What do you know? Things are finally looking up.
Especially since I managed to get out of my 'run after others' for a piece of happiness.
yup! definitely! things are looking up!
have a nice night everybody!
Saturday, January 21
a shift in focus
today a good friend of mine raised his voice on me, for something i considered a matter of etiquette (how does one spell etiquette anyway); then he stormed away.
i remained there passing through a range of states:
first was the 'being upset' part; the 'why did he do that' and 'i didn't deserve that' part; it took me close to five minute to shift focus within.
second, here is what i come up with, as a result of my shift in focus:
i don't have the power, nor the right to decide what you should be, do or have.
nor do i want them ( except for the moments when I do, but i'm not there now :) ).
it is your responsability to decide who you are and what image you may cast upon the mirrors around you; and the best part is that what you choose is not my concern at all.
that responsibility is to yourself (and to whom you want to see when you look in the mirror) not to me.
third, since after finding this out didn't bring my peace back, i looked further, and i found ... disappointment.
it seems to me that the hardest part of practicing seeing the best in the others is not deluding yourself.
thank heavens for disillusionment: it allows whoever is looking to see that others are whole not because they have no deffects, but inspite of them; thus, since defects - however one might see them - never 'chip' that perfection away, they are not defects at all.
the perfection never went away :)
in the end, disillusionment is good.
have a nice weekend.
Friday, January 20
green plants outside Limassol
this is what you find 200m from the shore, at the Limassol SeaFront.
Interesting, isn't it? :|
Wednesday, January 18
in the bones
why am I doing this?
In my moments of no-confusion (mostly in the mornings), i know where i am; i can see clearly the missing part as not really being a missing ... anything; i see the circumstance as perfect and complete and balanced; the minute perfection of the ... 'nothing in particular' ...
... and now, i remember that.
after loosing this 'no-confusion' state, anxiety appears again; i come back to the same patterns, same tensions, keeping to the same mistakes.
what am i trying to accomplish? what do i think i'm getting?
i know i'm getting old :)
... but the clarity of my view is coming into focus more often, and waiting for you turns into another illusion.
namas'te!
Tuesday, January 17
one face
why?
i felt i had to get out some things that i didn't want other people to see (friends of mine reading this weblog mostly)...
... and my weblog died (i no longer wrote in it and when i did, it was to keep it from dieing); maybe it's the same with life ... you keep on with what you feel you have to do, and put what represents you somewhere else ... where your friends won't see it; and then you die also.
so, here is my 'other blog'; i'll delete it in some time, or just leave it as is and restart blogging here;
the point i am trying to make here ... is ... not!
if you expect me here to try and tell you something ... anything ... i don't care!
go and do something usefull with your lives instead of reading a damn useless weblog!
read a book!
go outside!
Friday, January 13
comparision between a prostitute ands a programmer
2. You are paid a lot of money to keep your client happy.
3. You are paid well, but your pimp gets most of themoney.
4. You spend a majority of your time in anair-conditioned room.
5. You charge by the hour but your time can beextended for the right price.
6. You are not proud of what you do.
7. Creating fantasies for your clients is rewarded.
8. It's difficult to have a family.
9. You have no job satisfaction.
11. You are embarrassed to tell people what you do fora living.
12. People ask you, "What do you do?" and you can't explain it.
13. Your family hardly recognizes you at reunions (atleast the reunions you attend.)
14. Your friends have distanced themselves from you and you're left hanging with other "professionals."
15. Your client pays for your hotel room plus your hourly rate.
16. Your client always wants to know how much you charge and what they get for the money.
20. When you leave to go see a client, you look great, but return looking like hell (compare your appearance on Monday AM to Friday PM)
21. You are rated on your "performance" in an excruciating ordeal.
22. Even though you get paid the big bucks, it's the client who walks away smiling.
23. The client always thinks your "cut" of your billing rate is higher than it actually is, and in turn, expects miracles from you.
24. When you deduct your "take" from your billing rate, you constantly wonder if you could get a better deal with another pimp.
25. Everyday you wake up and tell yourself, "I'm not going to be doing this stuff the rest of my life."
Wednesday, January 11
on embalming
the process involved holding the body in salt in order to separate the moisture ans inserting all kinds of herbs into ... but lets not get into any gruesome details.
nowadays, the proceess is a bit different: first, you fall while skating, and hit your small finger;
then, you get convinced it's nothing and it'll pass in a few days;
then you talk to your friends and hear all kinds of horor stories like
a friend of mine had something like that, he didn't go to the doctor, and twenty years later he got cancer and died
ok, the stories weren't like that, but they convinced me to go to the clinic anyway.
i got some nice pictures of my small finger (and the nice double fracture i had in it);
i also got to chat with the nice lady doing the nice pictures ... and when i thought everything was allright in the world (hey, she had a nice smile!), this old mr. doctor guy came, and started embalming me.
methinks it's called a cast.
so that's it: no more scuba and no more skating! i need someone to tell me i have to be responsible, and it'll be like being married!
all that said, skating is still nice, and i would do it again (and probably will when the cast is off)
just part of the game i guess...
utnapistim
Thursday, January 5
more on skating
So, as a self-proclaimed expert on skating against the wind, here's my expert advice:
don't do it! It's freakin' exhausting!
(I'll probably go at it this evening also :) )
Monday, January 2
basic level
I just spent close to three hours in the parking lot behind the company, getting to a basic level:
I managed to turn, break and accelerate, managed some short, easy slopes and at the moment I’m working at those turning brakes and doing those long slides on one foot at a time.
I can’t wait for tomorrow evening :D
got my skates
i just bought a pair of Rocces skates, and this evening i’m taking them on a date :D
i can’t wait (and i hope i won’t break anything in the parking lot).
wish me luck
Saturday, December 31
I'm a Resque diver
I’ve finished the course today :)
All in all, it’s a great way to finish the year.
Thursday, December 29
rescue diver test
We still have to go through a practical session this saturday, but that’s … a practical session :)
I allready see myself as a resque diver :D
gggg!
Monday, December 26
christmas update
It's been some busy days.
Friday evening we decorated the christmas tree.
On saturday, I woke at 6 in the morning to do the first part of the practical of my Resque Diver course. At seven I was red-doing the webbing on my BCD (I changed the air-bladder); At a quarter to eight I was dropped of by the taxi in front of the dive shop, with bruised fingers (damn webbing was hard to put back!); I was an hour early (for sleepyness reasons).
So, what was interesting about the exercises?
First, my regulator was leaking (I left it at the shop for service).
Second, never ever approach a panicked diver at the surface, whatever the manual might say about it; If you wonder why, imagine that he/she is not rational, has enough adrenalin in the system to overpower you even if you are two times bigger, and will try to climb on anything floating, just to stay at the surface; It's logical what they'll do if something floating - namely you - approached them on the surface.
I learned more, but if you want to find out what, better take the resque course yourselves :)
Around lunch I got home, and I spent all afternoon with B and L in the kitchen, working on christmas food; My part was a big bowl of mayonese and eggplant (that is: aubergines) salad.
Here's a the christmas shopping done by B:
On Sunday we all went at D&I's place;
We ate some food, drank some stuff, then ate some more, then we ate some more again, then we had desert, in the true romanian tradition. Everything was (ofcourse) followed by the traditional collective stomach ache.
(I'll get some pictures of the happy event in the following days).
And today we went to Trodos on the rumor that there would be .5 metres of snow; It was true, except the .5 metres were the size of the patch, not it's overall thickness.
It was fun nonetheless.
Friday, December 23
you are what you eat
They say you are what you eat; This is the breakfast I had a few days ago, in office.
So, who am I?
Thursday, December 22
Tuesday, December 20
i'm offset
what does that mean?
it means that while today is tuesday (check your calendar if you don't belive me), around me today has been friday.
(really!)
i've had this ... idea? thought? ... whatever - that today is friday, and that I'll go home and prepare for christmas.
maybe it's the whole christmas atmosphere ... or the gifts received from the company ... or maybe it's the guys going home and doing christmas shopping ...
whatever it is, happy hanookah
or is it christmas?
happy holydays?
holy happydays?
whatever offsets you by three days i guess!
Saturday, December 17
my thoughts of late
Today I swept the floor in the living room and (as with all kinds of physical activity) it gave me some pause to think;
This post is about what I was thinking of ... well ... it's about what I'm thinking now of what I was thinking of then ... actually it's about what ...
ok, ok!
As of late there are a lot of things I'm much clearer about; mainly, it relates to relationship between feelings, states of mind, states of being, clearing your mind, increased (and decreased) consciousness and my goals.
Yeah ... I know ... not exactly your average, everyday topics ... is it? (no, but lately, they are mine :))
That is one of the things I thought about ... (or one of the things that my mind keeps returning to - if you will). Others things are, for example, looking at how my desires change ...
I also want to change the way I relate to some things ... and to some people ... and then I suddenly shift to moments of 'none of this matters' (I won't go into details here since they are in the habbit of reading my posts methinks).
I also shift between moments of clearness and moments of ... lots of goals and desires and ... it's difficult to explain - it's not exactly 'confusion', but it is a clouded mind.
I see in a clearer way the relationship between fear and love as sources for Being ... and posting on the forum has been helping a lot in this regard.
I guess the way choice really works for me is becomming clearer also, and that is the reason for these sudden changes (I mean I know that whatever I choose, I could have chosen anything else instead). It kind of puts things into perspective, especially when you see people that are so different than yourself, and realize that those people are - esentially - yourself.
Here is a small mind-stretching exercise:
Imagine that, for the sake of argument, matter, energy and time are one big happy ... blob of inter-related ... something (call it a big soup of quarks for all I care);
Imagine also - again, for the sake of argument - that we have a soul.
Now, this soul is no matter and no energy (let's ignore the '21grams argument' for this one, shall we?). It follows (through basic 11th grade logic) that your soul is not bound by time, not attracted by the sun, not getting older and so on and so forth ...
Third, imagine - yes, for the sake of argument again - that we re-incarnate. All these suppositions (and exercise in imagination) leads to a staggering conclusion:
There are no past and future lives. (yeah, this would be the point in my post when you stop beliving I'm a gonner, and start knowing it - right?).
But no, think about this: if the soul has no relationship to time, then there is no future life to choose from;. No past life either. Maybe it's ... contemporary life.
Maybe you end this life, and after that (if there is any 'after' involved here) you reincarnate as the guy who's been annoying you since you were six and bullying you in fifth grade;
Maybe there is something more to all that gibberish various 'masters' talked about, saying we are all one.
No, they didn't say it like that exactly ... but, for example Jesus said something to the effect of
In asmuch as you do this to the least of those, you do it to meand Sri Nisargadatta said that there is nothing except himself; that there is nobody else but him; then, the main character in the thin, red line (don't remember the name) said
Maybe there is only one soul, with a thousand faces
That's it: maybe we're like people jumping in the pool, joining the game, then getting out, staying in the sun, then joining again under a different face.
( except it's not a pool, it's a quark soup :) ).
So, there you go: this is what I've been thinking as of late, and these are the things I'm pondering while sweeping the floors.
ponderingly yours,
utnapistim
Lucky me I don't sweep the floors too often - i'd go mad in a hurry!
Friday, December 16
life
AM
SO
PROUD!
I received a 'thank you' gift from our CEO.
... no, no, no, I'm not that important ... i mean ... it's handsigned and everything ... but it's what everybody else got ...
Now, I have a desk full of gifts on my desk:
I got two shot glasses from Africa (brought from N who just went there)
... and I got a pen holder which is also a gift
... and now this ...
everybody?
i'm starting to feel like 'the godfather' here ...
confusedly yours,
utnapistim
Wednesday, December 14
toying with macro: garlic pealing
I started toying with macro photography this morning; these are some garlic peelings from monday evening: I ate garlic with shark filet (yes, there was more garlic than fish)
Tuesday, December 13
shiny and new
why?
well ... as the mighty Brain once said:
Pinky, never underestimate the power of Free T-Shirts!(then he tried to take over the world using a fake world made of newspapers and an asteroid ... i think)
I received a free T-Shirt and a mp3/wma player from the company, for christmas. Ofcourse, the t-shirt is a bit ugly and the mp3 player has 256Mb but I'm not perfect to complain here ...
And besides it's a perfect player for my MTB.
Friday, December 9
found my light
in shape
again :)
I'm listening to shivaree and looking for hiphop.
why? one might ask.
no reason. because i feel like it.
so HERE I AM!
anyway :)
I' half-way through the EFR course and last night I kissed ANNIE. and she didn't do anything!
guess I'm not as homme fatale as i thought i'd be ... i mean ... she didn't react! at all!
Regarding future plans ... this weekend i'm in for some study: I have to fill the EFR exam papers by monday afternoon (I get the manual this evening) and I allready got the resque diver manual yesterday.
the perspective of resque has been scary for a while but looking through the manual it starts to make sense (big pictures that even I can understand, you know?)
I also hope to make it out of the house for a few hours (maybe sunday), because
all fun and no play makes jack a dull boy.
that's it for now: It's back to work, since I should have gotten the *NIX permissions for installing the latest build by now.
oh joy!
HERE I AM,
utnapistim on the net
Thursday, December 8
Wednesday, December 7
Tuesday, December 6
all happy
so why am I happy?
no reason
maybe it's just my crazy idea that everything's fine; maybe I'm just on a coffee high; or just one of my normal morning moods.
anyway, I got to go: saint nicholaus brought me some sweets (and I didn't even write him a postcard :D).
Monday, December 5
quote
Your wise quote is: "The best antiques are old
friends" by Unknown...
Your buds is the source of your happiness
(maybe not all but still). Even if it's just
one, a couple or a whole group they are the
ones you can't wait to see. It does not matter
if you're shy with everyone else or not, with
them you let your true spirit shine and can be
as loud as you want. They accept you, and you
love them for that.
What wise quote fits you? [pics]
brought to you by Quizilla
white river dive
It was the first time I put a large rock in my BCD pocket to be able to stay down. Other than that, it was a smooth ride (well ... dive).
Also, half way through the dive (as my tank was half empty) I had to get some extra-weights (again) because I was starting to float.
Enough with the boring stuff, here are some pictures:

underwater sky, originally uploaded by utnapistim. This was taken aproximately 10 minutes into the dive (~6m depth); The surface was very very calm and the clouds are perfectly visible :D

jellyfish in the sky, originally uploaded by utnapistim. This was a bit of an experiment on my part: I went under it and shot it against the sky; it turned out looking good
Dive technical data:
time in:14:39
time out: 15:33
(dive time: 54 minutes)
water temperature: 20.4 deg. Celsius
max depth: 12.8m
Friday, December 2
Thursday, December 1
things are moving again
Also, saturday me and S. will be going to Paphos for a dive. I haven't called the guys there yet, so it's still 'in planning phase' so to speak.
wish me luck with the course :)
I'm going back to eating olives with my chopsticks.
se'ya!
the tyranny of email
As an example, I received an email from a company called BSIL, and this was on their home page:
'We are a global, end-to-end IT solutions provider with a global delivery footprint. With over 20 years of experience, we understand our customers’ needs better and provide a portfolio of services, using robust processes, which enable them to leverage their IT investments.'
Do you have any idea what these people do? Nor do I. (Apparently they 'provide solutions' :)
this website is preety insightfull.










































