Friday, July 27

reasoning failure (out of my mind)

Since I started telling people I'll be going home by bike, everyone I'm close to, has (at one point or another) tried to convince me not to go for it.

I realize that they did this because they got scared, because they care about me and in the beginning, I kept trying to find excuses for wanting this, to justify myself and giving reasons for going. I even let them convince me it was not worth it (the risks were too high, there was no benefit, I would get there faster by plane et caetera, et caetera).

Then, I spoke (quite by chance) with W. and when I'm in her presence, I (for some reason) try to be "honest to myself" (or something like that).

I told her that leaving reasons aside, if anybody asked me, it's actually not even a question if it's worth going. Yes, it's worth it, and more.

Then, I said to myself that the reasons for going (or not going) cannot tell me who I am, so I will do what represents me, leaving all reason aside.

From that point onwards the idea was sold: I would go, and that was that.

Now, I tell myself that, nobody got anywhere (that mattered) by following reason. Reason is a Good ThingTM, but for minimizing the risks, not for taking decisions.

When crossing the road (as a simple example) reason would tell you simply, not to do it (it's dangerous). If, instead you decide first that you will cross that road, then reason dictates simply to look before crossing.

By talking with my close ones, I've heard a lot of reasons not to do this (and here they are, along with some answers, now that I've decided):
  • you must have a plan, you can't go just like that.
  • ...and I have a plan, I'm not going just like that.

  • There's no point in taking stupid risks.
  • They're not stupid, they're calculated; and without risks, there's no adventure. If it weren't so, everybody would speak about their exciting lives in routine, in doing the same thing every day.

  • There's no point in taking unnecessary risks.
  • I'm not. I've decided I will do this, that I will benefit from the experience. From this point onwards, the steps to take are simply necessary to get there. I will still try to minimize the risks though.

  • Why aren't you just taking a plane ride?
  • I did that before, and will do so again. For this holiday I've decided it's not the destination, but the road that mattered.

  • It's not worth it.
  • Worth it for whom? For me, it definitely is, for you, I cannot decide. If it's not worth it for you, feel free not to take any bike rides in the foreseeable future.

  • Are you out of your mind?
  • I sure hope so. Whenever it matters to me, I try to be (but don't always succeed). In fact, of all the decisions I've taken, the best ones have been when I WAS out of my mind: when I left all thought aside and asked myself what really mattered to me, What did I really want?


And now, after taking my decision, I'm reasoning: I'm trying to minimize risks and have some fun.

I'll post some more, as things progress.

4 comments:

Alina Popescu said...

Given your holiday plans, I have to say the road through Bulgaria will be a bitch...Try heading to Sofia first, and not taking the direct road to Bucharest. It looks depressing, the towns are very little and the decent hotels I have seen are only close to the border. And number 2, be extra careful from Istanbul to the border (hitghway all the way). Oh, and try to find out if you can ride a bike on the highway. In Romania you are not.

Alina Popescu said...

:))) I just read below. That kind of bike???? I never thought of that because I would never imagine such a big fuss for anything other than a bicycle. :P Jees, me needs to wakes up :)

utnapistim said...

Actually, I was counting on some highways :)

I'm making a fuss about it as my sense of adventure usually involves sitting in front of the computer screen. :)

It's the first time I have a trip like this and lots of things can go wrong (especially on a motorbike), starting with accidents (I've only ridden on the left side of the road until now and am quite a beginner on a motorbike), engine failures and ending with gasoline problems.

I expect things to go smoothly though.

Anonymous said...

http://quotes4all.net/quotations/katherine%20mansfield/quotes.html
for all the good times we shared.. loosing sleep..still my heart.